31 July 2006


Amazing what a £10 budget and a session on the iTunes music store will do for a troubled mind.

30 July 2006

Just out of interest

*Are* there people who go round with walking sticks on crowded trains, just so they can sit in first class for free? I'm not talking devotee, pretender, whatever, I'm talking pure mercenary upgrade-fraudsters.

And incidentally, you'd be hard pressed to tell the difference between first class and standard class on Southern.

I realise I am getting a little obsessed by this.


29 July 2006

And the real reason I'm annoyed is that

Use of public transport is exempt from the DDA, so although the bloke was acting like a twat, he is legally entitled to discriminate against me as much as he likes, at least until 2020.

That sucks arse.

I have written a letter. I think I may have morphed into Hyacinth Bucket.

28 July 2006

Of course, what I meant to say in the last post was


27 July 2006

Random bloke, I love you

Train. Standing Room Only In Standard Class. Loads of Room in First Class. Ticket Inspector hanging round in aisle. True story

Me: [Perches in First Class.]
Him: So you're happy to pay for a first class upgrade, then?
Me: No. It's ten minutes to the first stop. I can't stand. Someone'll get off at Clapham and I'll go and sit in standard.
Him: I have to charge you an upgrade if you sit in first.
Me: Well, I can't stand and there aren't any seats in standard, so what do you suggest?
Him: Do you have a Registered Disabled Persons Card?
Me: No. I don't think there is such a thing. I get Disability Living Allowance. I am disabled. I don't have a card. What's a registered disabled persons card?
Him: I don't know. It's what the rules say you have to have.
Me: I have a walking stick and a hole in my brain. Does that count as proof?
Him: No. I'm just following the rules.
Me: Help me out, mate. I don't *want* to sit in first class. There's some people in the priority seats up there who didn't move when I got on. Can you give me a hand with them? That's what those seats are there for.
Him: I'm not authorised to ask them to move.
Me: What?
Him: I don't have the authority.
Me: So you have the authority to make a disabled girl stand up all the way to Brighton when there are loads of empty seats here, but you don't have the authority to ask some non-disabled people to get out of seats they shouldn't be in in the first place? Nice.
Him: The conductor can ask them to move.
Me: Can you get the conductor for me?
Him: He's at the other end of the train. You can go and find him.
Me: I can't walk to the other end of a moving train for exactly the same reason I can't stand all the way to Brighton.
Him: Do you want to pay for an upgrade or not?
Me: Not.
Him: Then I'm sorry but you'll have to stand.
Me: Can you arrange for me to be stretchered off at Brighton?
Him: Pardon?
Me: It's just if I do have to stand for much longer, I'll need an ambulance at the other end, so if you could just arrange that, I'd be grateful.
Him: [dumbstruck]

Random bloke somewhere in the standard class carriage: Have my seat.

22 July 2006

Songs which are actually about disabled girls #1

18 July 2006

Should you be looking

If you are my friend, you are now banned from having a major life event until September.


13 July 2006

Ungrateful bitch

The thing about lots of things going well is that that makes other things complicated. That's fine, yeah, but they should warn you about it, maybe before you're born.

10 July 2006

It's OK

I've cheered up now.

09 July 2006

About 9 months ago

I realised I wasn't immortal. I don't really mind that I'm not immortal. It's not that important.

I'm really bothered that people I love aren't immortal. That's what's shit about the whole mortality situation.

05 July 2006


Being grown up is complicated.

04 July 2006

I know you're in love

but holding hands across the table on the train while making doe eyes at each other should be made illegal. By all means, go and have sex in the loos, but please don't do that.


03 July 2006

Value for Money

So the dress gets a second outing this time next week. Told you it was worth it.