I am totally over it

1a. New foundation (it actually stays on).
1b. New eyelid foundation (don't ask).
2. New dress (don't tell mother).
3. New coat (half price).
4. New cardigan (skull and crossbones).
5. New cleanser (pink).
6. New cotton wool (pads).
7. New cod liver oil (times three).
8. New nail polish remover and cosmetic sponges (cheap).
9. New applicators (foam).
10. New mirror (polka dot).
11. New shoes (same old).
12. New ferrules (rubber).

And then some.